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Lost & Left Behind

by The Sunset Doctrine

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  • Digital Album
    Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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  • Limited Edition 12" Black Vinyl
    Record/Vinyl + Digital Album

    Limited first pressing on 12" standard black vinyl. Housed in a jacket w/ full-color insert and center labels.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Lost & Left Behind via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

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  • “Window” Pocket Tee
    T-Shirt/Apparel

    An exclusive shirt for The Sunset Doctrine's "Lost & Left Behind" vinyl release. Two-sided print featuring the TSD letter mark on the front, and the window icon on the back. Printed on an “Ivory” Comfort Color 6030 pocket tee.

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  • Wallet CD
    Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Housed in a double-pocket wallet, and includes an insert w/ lyrics. CD wallets are made from 100% recyclable materials and are printed using green-friendly ink. The first 30 pre-orders include an exclusive 11x17" poster.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Lost & Left Behind via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

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1.
Quiet Bloom 03:52
So still, quiet, and complacent You wait for your change of pace to bloom Well it’s taken lifetimes To find the right time to speak out Now you know not what to say But you’re just a word away It’s drowned out the comforting sound A quarter life—a crisis of middle ground And you can’t decide How to choose a side when it gives out And you know not how to up and go But you know only the buried below can grow It’s been such a long and weary ride When suddenly, seasons start to slow from your bedside ‘Cause when the corners of your mattress start to curl Better just get up, go, and face the world And the plans you drew They just need some follow-through When you’ve nothing left to lose Just leave and start anew So still, quiet, and complacent You wait for your change of pace to bloom Well it’s taken lifetimes To find the right time to speak out Now you know just what to say
2.
Wait Is this the end of our last take? A sudden seal upon our fate We cut and print and check the gate So I’ll stay Just as long as you’re awake Before you drift and I just fade Into the background of your day So let’s just drive around Until the feelings fade And cry both our eyes out For that which we can’t change (And throw both our backs out With that which we can’t take) (And scream both our lungs out With that which we can’t change) And watch the days replay Before they burn away So let’s just drive around And wait See A long-awaited final scene Like sinking ships slow to the sea We played our parts out patiently But I’m afraid That I may never love that way And even more that you just may So I’ll just sit and roll the tape As sure as the morning light will find A leak in the lace between your blinds All of the lines and scripted lies Will flow through your window Gleaming the dust under your glare And grow in the middle So dim in the dusk, I’ll hold you here And in the rearview I’ll remember you that way Warm in autumn’s sun Fragile and unafraid To hushed and motionless Forever safe in frame So I’ll just drive around Two-eighty-one until you meet Casey Road Then turn left and stay strong To find how far it can go Credit roll
3.
’97 Crown 04:46
Asleep outside Back porch bottles broke and bone dry Like your lazy eye And the kitchen’s trashed My phone is dead, they’re all piles of ash So I guess I’ll crash Two months in the cold My Yankee blood ain’t enough to dull So I down it whole It’s like getting high In a decommissioned cop car that you buy On your parents’ dime But how am I the one who’s sober and so over it? A shopworn shitshow Think it’s time I bow out with the curtain call ‘Cause I know it well—you won’t ever change It’s as comforting as it’s strange now So mourn me on the couch Another decade gone Like rug from under the same songs That you’d dance ‘til dawn Now sometimes when I drive Between routines on Friday night Oh—I miss the sight But how am I the one who’s older and so over it? A maudlin mess Maybe it’s time I reach out with the colder call But I know it good—it wouldn’t be the same It’s as sickening as it’s strange now So mourn me on the couch
4.
Driving through the streets of your neighborhood With the windows rolled down I swear I almost could see you in the passenger Feet upon the dash And humming along to “Came Out Swinging” But my eyes deceive when I’m all alone And as I pass the patterned steps to your home This goddamn place could burn down ‘Cause I swear since you left This town got a little smaller Those worn-out places Suburban breeding grounds I’m such an orphan A slave to this damn abandoned town So doll up all those homesick thoughts You needn’t waste a night While I’m at home—just sick And much too tired to fight I’m clearing off a table set for one And lying to myself About the things I think need done Like change my sheets And rearrange those books unread ‘Cause I swear since you left My bed got a little colder So with a warm beer and ten-cent cigar I’ll make the best of tonight Swapping story after story with friends of friends Pretending to take interest when they speak But no one cares how drunk you got last week So I’ll try not to move ‘Cause I swear Since you left your things over at my place I can’t stop dreaming up your ghost With bedhead and blue jeans And if you find someday That our paths reintertwine No—I won’t be afraid
5.
Kenopsia 05:38
“Do you still love anything at all Like you did as a kid?” She asked and I shrugged it off I can’t find where everything went wrong Just a gradual defeat, I guess A subtle freefall And now I am not afraid to speak my truth In that I have grown afraid of what I’ll lose Now I’m feeling lost and left behind And I can’t seem to clear my mind Can’t seem to catch my breath But still I try Day by day, I’m getting by This routine is just running dry And I’m running out of time The phone calls get fewer year after year “Just a line ‘cause you’re on my mind— To say that I’m still here” My belt is loose ‘cause I’m not eating Eyes are dry, hair receding And I don’t feel right at home when I am And now I am not afraid to speak my truth Because I have grown afraid of losing you The phone calls get fewer year after year And I swear this is the one where I don’t pick up I’ve not much of anything to say anyway ‘Cause nothing’s changed My roots still cling to here I’m twenty-five and I’m still nowhere near The person I thought I’d be by now Now I try to change my storyline But I can’t seem to leave behind The prologue that I wrote myself
6.
Only Heaven 05:47
Silhouetted in the light Of the season’s new distraction And empty as the nest you made You lay alone and start to fade But dreaming’s got you down There’s no shut eye in this town When the pictures in their frames all start to play And you can’t tell the real from the fake Then just fall awake A dozen miles down the road Might as well be half a million Where holy as the day you wed You kneel beside a hollow bed But heaven’s far at best There’s no seventh day of rest When the idols on your walls all seem to sway And you lay with a shame that you can’t shake Then just fall awake And now we live our lives from date to fate ‘Cause you can drive for hours any way And still not leave the state Because it’s landlocked Long-lost and left behind With no promise left to break So just fall awake

about

Written during the time between adolescence and adulthood, “Lost & Left Behind” is an honest look at the struggle with coming of age without coming undone. From the quiet pining for a youth removed to the reflections on relationships losing ground, each track details a different feeling of loss while exploring the thoughts that arise in response. Despite its six-song runtime, they each come together to create a record that’s as emotive as it is dynamic—encompassing every driving movement and silent stagnancy experienced while learning what it means to grow up.

For more music + merch, visit Sunday Drive Records: bit.ly/TSD-LALB

credits

released March 20, 2020

All songs written and co-produced by Sean Lazaga

Produced, engineered, and mixed by Kieran Krebs
at Overcast Recordings in Austin, Texas

Additional recording by Sean Lazaga at home in San Antonio, Texas

Mastered by Michael Fossenkemper at TurtleTone Studio in New York City, New York

Vocals, guitars, and keys by Sean Lazaga
Bass by Chris Lazaga
Drums by Jason Kollar
Violin by Nick Hammel
Viola by Ruben Balboa III
Cello by Geoff Manyin
Pedal steel by Zack Wiggs
Supporting vocals by Bree Lazaga
String arrangements by Sasha Klare-Ayvazian
Art direction by Sean Lazaga
Photography by Jason Ytuarte
Layout and design by Jonathan Lee Gonzales

Thank you to Bree, Autumn, Mom, Dad, Chris, Nick, Megan, Chelsea, Kieran Krebs, Jason Kollar, Jason Ytuarte, Sasha Klare-Ayvazian, Kristin Kyne, Elisha Wright, Andrew Kershner, Renee Vega, Judd Klement, Ashley Nodar, Liz Ruggles, Brent Riley, Daniel Planas, Stephen Bennett, Logan Price, Spencer Clayton, the Nodar, Mercado, and Kershner families, Jonathan Lee Gonzales and the SDR team, my dog Aubrey, and anyone who’s ever listened.

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The Sunset Doctrine San Antonio, Texas

The Sunset Doctrine is the solo project of Sean Lazaga from San Antonio, Texas.

Weaving intricate melodies with earnest lyrics, Lazaga draws inspiration from the intrapersonal—wandering between intimate acoustics and layered loops in a nostalgic stream of consciousness awash in natural light. ... more

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